Shopaholics Anonymous!

My New Home!!!!

2010-10-27T13:57:00.001-04:00

I wont be posting here anymore u guys so u can check me at http://shardonaysays.tumblr.com

Are you afraid of dying?

2010-04-19T13:14:00.001-04:00

yes. im terrified of dying

Ask me anything

formspring.me

2010-02-22T15:42:00.001-05:00

How bout some less vulgar questions people?! http://formspring.me/thalyracist

formspring.me

2010-02-22T15:05:00.001-05:00

Im opening the floor again to hear yall crazy questions! http://formspring.me/thalyracist

I've Moved!!!!

2010-01-28T14:27:00.003-05:00

..for the time being anyway. Check me out at shardonaysays.tumblr.com

Emilio Pucci Leather Thigh High Boots

2009-10-13T13:40:00.003-04:00

Buy HERE

Alexander Wang Spider Lace Bandage Dress

2009-09-28T15:38:00.001-04:00

Fresh from Milan's Fashion Week. Buy HERE

Herve Leger Contrast Bandage Dress

2009-09-02T17:56:00.001-04:00

I need this in my life. Buy HERE

Alexander McQueen Faithful Houndstooth Tote

2009-08-27T20:10:00.001-04:00

Buy Here

Free Music: AV Club-8 Bit Porno Beats

2009-08-06T17:11:00.008-04:00

EDIT: The link was down, but it's fixed now.

The first EP from this Detroit hip hop group is pleasantly different than alot of the groups that I have heard from recently. I saw them at a show a while back and was very impressed. My fav tracks off the album are Just Another Day, U & I, and Dreams. Click the pic for the download. Also check their blog @ It's Av Baby

RIP Baatin

2009-08-01T14:45:00.000-04:00

Off Duty Firefighters Save Mom And Two Children

2009-07-23T13:56:00.000-04:00

Fuckin amazing.....

New Music: Christina Milian & The Dream-Chameleon

2009-07-14T13:01:00.003-04:00

The song's not half bad. I'm still a lil upset wit Christina for the whole Teirra Marie/"Diamonds" situation, but The Dream did what he does best wit this track. Create watery hits for the masses. Enjoy!

Lupe Fiasco "Lasers" Trailer

2009-07-09T12:20:00.002-04:00

I love me some Lupe Fiasco, and even though it's short, it's serves its purpose and I'm looking forward to LASERS when it drops.

New Music:Chris Brown-Not My Fault (Produced by The Neptunes)

2009-06-23T12:28:00.002-04:00

I was surpirsed that I actually liked the song. I figured it would be about the whole "beating up Rhianna-Gate" but it's definitely worth the listen.

Jimmy Choo x H&M

2009-06-18T12:58:00.001-04:00

Jimmy Choo will join the likes of Roberto Cavalli, Karl Lagerfield, & Stella McCartney with their very own collection exclusively for H&M. It will hit 200 H&M stores across the globe on November 14th. The line will include shoes, handbags, and clothing for both men and women. I doubt it will hit the H&M here in Dearborn, but I'll be waiting in line if it does.

Link

Throwback of the Day: Youngbloodz w/ Big Boi-85

2009-06-17T14:23:00.002-04:00

Youngbloodz - 85 Featuring Jim Crow & Big Boi (Official Music Video) - Funny blooper videos are here

I love this beat so much, that I wrote a song to it. The Youngbloodz were one of the better acts out of the South, and I hope they continue to come out with new music.

Sara Stokes w/ T-Pain: What's Wrong

2009-06-16T14:11:00.005-04:00

I was actually a fan of Da Band, so I was excited when I stumbled onto this track with her and Teddy P. I hope to hear more new music from her in the near future.

Lonely Island w/The Roots-I'm On A Boat

2009-05-13T16:24:00.003-04:00

Live performance from Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. Black Thought is doing T-Pain's part, and I honestly can't tell the difference.

Random Photos #3

2009-05-04T15:33:00.003-04:00

Just a bunch of photos from my crazy drunken and smoked out weekend.

Nina Sky- On Some Bull

2009-05-01T11:16:00.001-04:00

I love this song. I've always kinda liked Nina Sky, and I'm glad to see them putting out material. Hopefully it leads to an album.

Throwback of the Day: KP & Envee-Shorty Swing My Way

2009-04-29T10:36:00.001-04:00

If this wasn't ur jam at any point in ur life, body urself.

Random Photos

2009-04-21T18:19:00.002-04:00

I went to Union Street which is this super cool restaurant in Midtown Detroit wit my coworkers Nada and Jason.

Nada

Jason

Jason's Ravioli

Waiting on the bus at Woodward and Warren

Some Hipsters Walking By

That tiger is so fierce!!!

Some nice gold leggings at Charlotte Russe

Throwback of the Day: Irene Cara-Hot Lunch

2009-04-20T19:32:00.002-04:00

I LOVE FAME!!!!!!!! This was my second favorite song in this movie, but my favorite choreography piece. I was so into that I wanted to go to performing arts school. BTW where is Irene Cara now?

No Reason...I Just Thought It Was Fly

2009-04-17T00:33:00.002-04:00

Behind The Scenes of Day26 New Video

2009-04-13T19:02:00.001-04:00

I'm a huge fan of Day26 and MTB, and I really like the album especially this song.

RIP Asia

2009-04-11T14:14:00.002-04:00

A friend of mine was murdered yesterday on the Henry ford Community College campus. She was very talented, and it's sad what the world is coming to.

How Do You Know If A Guy Is Feeling You?

2009-04-09T19:29:00.002-04:00

We Wish It Was Still That Simple

I got a home girl, and she is feeling this guy. She doesn't know if he just sees her as a friend or if he wants more. She asked me, and I was like "I don't know. I'm not that familiar on how guys think." So I was hoping one of you intelligent brothers out there could help us out. What are signs that a guy likes you or LIKES YOU likes you?

My Week So Far(Extremely Random so Excuse Me Please).....

2009-04-07T18:13:00.004-04:00

~I've really been tryna do this music shit, but it's starting to get on my nerves. Why do R&B producers charge so much for beats? What happened to showing love to us struggling artists? Damn! lol

~Still aint found a good man yet. There is a couple of candidates for the title of Mr. Right Now, so I guess thats all I can ask for.

~That damn Young Money song is stuck in my head and no matter what else I listen to, it wont go away

~Obviously she don't get the hint if she still sending lil slick shit over the internet, or maybe u aint said nothing to her bout it. I wonder which one it is. Hmm...

~Still looking for an affordable apartment in the Midtown-Downtown Detroit area. If i dont find one soon, then its back to Ecorse

~I Want These

~I haven't had Popeye's Chicken since you bought me some, and I'm really fiendin for it

~I finished my scarf. It's kinda jacked but I love it!!!

Consequence w/ Kid Cudi-Buggin Out 09

2009-04-06T15:56:00.002-04:00

Saw the video on MTV Jamz, and I thought it was dope. I can't explain what it is, but there is something about Kid Cudi that I find entertaining.

Seether-Careless Whispers

2009-04-02T17:43:00.002-04:00

I'm not a fan of Seether or much hard rock for that matter, but I really like Careless Whispers and I think they did a really good job.

P!NK- Sober

2009-03-22T22:02:00.003-04:00

I've always been a fan of Pink since her R&B days, and she always has a song on each of her albums that I feel that she is speaking directly to me. Sober, the most recent single off her 5th album, Funhouse, is becoming an instant fav of mine.

What I Have Been Doing The Past Week...

2009-03-17T11:28:00.002-04:00

Things just don't interest me like they used to. So I saw a co-worker crocheting, and I was like "I can do that shit" so I started. Needless to say, I'm the truth at it.

See? Told you.

Other than that, I've been seeing a vocal coach to try and keep this dream of becoming a singer alive. It's been going pretty well. I can notice a change in my voice, and I very excited about continuing with it.

Also, been doing a little writing. An ex of mine does some producing, and me and him have been working together on some songs that seems to be coming along.

Other than that, same ol' same ol'. I hope y'all are having more fun than I am!

Until next time.........

Reebok Pump Omni Lites

2009-03-11T13:43:00.001-04:00

Buy Here

Dude Going Nutz On Keri Hilson

2009-03-10T20:29:00.001-04:00

I died watching this. I dont even wanna try and fill anyon whats going on that led to this. If you really wanna know, Google Beyonce Ciara Keri Hilson beef. Until then, watch the video. You will not regret it! lol

Throwback of the Day-Hot Sex On A Platter-A Tribe Called Quest

2009-03-06T13:23:00.002-05:00

I love this song, and it's been in my head for a long time. I always wondered why Q-Tip had that shit on his face.

Victoria's Secret Pink Cut Out One Piece

2009-03-05T19:46:00.002-05:00

Buy Here

New Layout!!!!

2009-03-05T18:27:00.001-05:00

I loved the old one. I created it with my bare hands!!!! But I thought it was time for a change. Let me know what you guys think!!!!

Lil Wayne-Prom Queen

2009-03-04T10:21:00.002-05:00

It is hit or miss with me when it comes to Lil Wayne, but for some odd reason, I really like this song.

Me On MY PhotoShop Ish!

2009-02-25T13:57:00.002-05:00

I was bored at work, and Phonte of Little Brother sent this Barry White cover out via Twitter and wanted someone to photoshop him in.

Now I decided to put in my co-worker Nada cuz she wanted to be on the blog, and i threw in a brick to make it more realistic.

Dope, right?

This Guy Is Having Too Much Fun

2009-02-24T23:52:00.002-05:00

Damn! Is That A Girl?

2009-02-23T22:33:00.003-05:00

I'm not big on basketball other than the NBA, but this chick dunking had me ooohin' and ahhhin'. Her name is Brittney Griner, and she's still in high school. Check the video for yourself to see what the hype is about.

My Life Sucks!!!!

2009-02-16T20:51:00.002-05:00

Dis been my face for the past month:

Working two jobs non stop and tryna manage school doesn't leave me much room to manage a blog. But I be tryin y'all!!!!!!

I got some new shoes!

Maybe next post I'll have something more interesting for y'all to read. :(

I Survived The Bush Administration

2009-02-03T17:50:00.001-05:00

I'm SO getting this shirt!!!!

My New Crush!!!!!

2009-02-02T13:22:00.002-05:00

Ain't nothin finer than a man with a brain!!!! I'm thinking bout relocating to ATL just to get a better chance.

My 100th Post! Interview w/ Chaundon

2009-01-27T16:29:00.004-05:00

It's my 100th post!!! Yay! I couldn't find a better way to celebrate it than interviewing one of mah fav rappers Chaundon.

In the state of hip hop today, it seems as if finger snapping and bling has taken the place of pure creativity and showmanship. Thank God for rappers like Chaundon that still exists in the music industry. Born and raised in the Bronx, Chaundon honed his skills while attending college in North Carolina. While he was there, he met Phonte and Rapper Big Pooh of Little Brother and together they created the Justus League. Since its inception, Chaundon has toured all over the world and released numerous mixtapes and a LP titled Carnage. Out of his busy schedule recording his next album, Chaundon has taken time out for an exclusive interview with me, and as expected he didn’t disappoint. After reading the interview, go check out his MySpace Page.

How you doing?

I’m doing well. I’m working like a mad man in the studio. Life is good, can’t complain!

I got the opportunity to listen to Carnage last year, and I really enjoyed it, as did a lot of critics. How did that make u feel?

I appreciate you taking the time to check out my album! The positive feedback was great. Even the negative feedback lol. Every opinion about my music makes me focus on recording 100% better. It drives me to continue to work hard and give the buying public a product worth spending their money on.

Tell me something about u that people don’t know about Chaundon yet?

I can cook better than anyone in the game! I am a phenomenal dancer and I am a rapper lol. Since "rappers" in the game say they are not rappers, I just want the people to know, who don’t already know, that I am a rapper!!

Are you a different person now then you was 5 years ago?

Of course I’m a different person from 5 years ago. I age like fine wine I get better with time. 5 years ago I was dope. Now I’m great. 5 years later I will become legendary.

What do you see yourself as being in 5 years from now?

Other than being legendary as I stated in the previous question, 5 years from now I will be directing porn. My company TriPod Films will bring a new definition to the world of adult entertainment.

Are you happy with the life you have?

I absolutely love the life I have now. I get paid to rap!! What can be better? Thanks to Little Brother and Big Dho, I got the chance to tour the US and Europe before I released my debut album Carnage. I get to work with artists and producers I grew up listening to. What 9 to 5 offers that??

So at the end of the day, what would you want people to be able to say about you and your music?

That’s up to them to voice their opinion about me and my music. My job is to put out the best music I possibly can to sway the people to say great things. But if I had to come up with a statement it would be for them to say that I saved the game from being a game full of trendy rappers who only bite off of others because it seems like the cool thing to do. I am cut from a cloth where originality was the corner stone of music. Why would I wanna sound like the guy who sounds like the other 10 artists who copied the so called originator? It doesn’t make any sense.

What's good for Chaundon for the 09?

In 09 I am set to release my second album NO EXCUSES. I am really proud of the work I put into this project. Expect to see more videos. I also will be strengthening my on line presence. I have a lot to do in order to reach my goal of being legendary in 5 years!!

What was the last lie you told?

The last lie I told "No girl, I don’t think you're a hoe"

What's the farthest you've ever gone on a dare?

The farthest I went on a dare, hmmmm, I became an emcee!

What's your favorite childhood memory?

I have too many memories to name. We will have to make a special "memories" interview with Chaundon lol.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

No. But I do believe in Lust at first sight!!

What are you afraid of?

Nothing.

Boxers or Briefs?

None when I’m with a broad hahahah

Is there anything that you have done that you regret, if so what was it?

I regret nothing! Everything I do makes me who I am!

50 Reasons To Have Sex Pt 3

2009-01-13T16:09:00.003-05:00

This is the third installment of my quest to find the reason why men have sex. Now this list was created by two men with none of my input, and doesn't neccisarily reflect the views of me, ShardonaySays.Blogspot.com, or any of its affiliates. But I still find it hilarious. Here are PART 1 & PART 2.

21. Luck

22. Religious Reasons

23. Playin' The Odds

24. Because She's Alive

25. She's Pregnant

26. She's On Birth Control

27. She's A Freak

28. It's Sex.

29. Procrastination

30. Money

Lazy Town Remix Ft. Lil Jon

2009-01-08T15:46:00.000-05:00

It made me feel better. LOL

I Need A Drink

2009-01-06T16:25:00.001-05:00

I don't feel good. I'm bored, and stuck in the house. UGH

50 Reasons To Have Sex Pt 2

2008-12-30T18:18:00.003-05:00

I asked a group of male friends why they had sex, and this is what they came up with. These are in no way my opinions, but I still find it hilarious. Here's the link to PART 1

11. Someone Bet You Couldn't Do It
12. Revenge on Them or Significant Other
13. Cuz They Heard She Was A Hoe
14. Cuz They Are Drunk
15. Cuz She's Drunk
16. Cuz They Are High
17. Cuz She's High
18. Cuz They Can
19. Cuz She wants To
20. Why Not?

Guest Blogger Tells Us His 10 Reasons To Have Sex

2008-12-22T13:10:00.003-05:00

I'm being really lazy and I am definitely gon post Pt 2 in the next couple of days, but my home skillet from Speech Is My Hammer kicked to me his 10 reasons he believes he has sex. After you read definitely go swing by his spot and check him out!

1. Bragging writes. To be able to say that you were able to use your assets/game to get a girl to fuck/suck/whatever and be telling the truth is a good feeling. (One of my niggas has girls on his buddy list that he's about to beat out, and the buddy list category is named "Conquests." Think about it.)
2. Cuz you're bored.
3. For exercise. Burns madd calories.
4. To convince yourself—and others, and her—that you've still got it. That confidence can carry on to other areas of your life, and just have you feeling good in general.
5. To keep shorty on lock. Sometimes, givin' her quality D is all you need to keep her there.
6. To not wonder "what if." Sometimes, when a girl is super, duper fine and you DON'T fuck wit her when you have the green light, you feel weird as fuck after not taking advantage of the opportunity.
7. To have sex with other women. Having sex with one woman and getting a GDR—Good Dick Report—will increase your value and ability to have sex with other women.
8. To avoid blue balls. Shit sucks.
9. Cuz the head wasn't enough. You don't only read the prequel or the first three chapters of a book, right? ... Unless those were the best three chapters of your life, which happens.
10. To have children? lmao

50 Reasons To Have Sex Pt. 1

2008-12-15T13:19:00.002-05:00

I was watching this show call How I Met Your Mother, and they had this episode on finding 50 reasons people have sex. So I decided to ask my male friends to do the same thing. These are the first ten, and I'll keep posting them throughout the week. DISCLAIMER: I didnt come up with ANY of these responses, but i find them all hilarious. Dont be mad at me if u find something offensive. Just change the channel. Holla!

1. There is stuff that comes out of the penis and it makes men feel good.

No brainer.

2. To do the Dougie: Reference: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyUdZMkWw_M

I didn't get this one, but who really understands half of the logic guys use so I digress.

3. To do the Heisman: Reference: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFw8-5WljI8

I don't know what it is with guys and dancing on women during sex.

4. Dougie/Heisman Combo

Come on! Really ?!?

5. Like Being Rode By A Girl

I guess......

6. They like the sounds a vagina makes (My gay co-worker's favorite)

This one makes me laugh on the inside.

7. Sex Can Be Used As Commerce

True...

8. He likes to be called daddy during, but partner can't be sired from genitalia

Now, these are exact quotes. Just letting yall know.

9. It's easier to ask for head afterwards.

Shaking my head at this point.

10. Blackmail

lol

I got four more posts to go, so I'll try my best to put the rest up

Random Thoughts #2 (Very Embarrasing)

2008-12-09T17:02:00.002-05:00

if i could eat popeye's chicken everyday, i would be the happiest person on earth

i can sing circles around most female singers out right now, but u would never know cuz im too shy

i have been on a wedding kick for the past three weeks.

i dont wanna get married but i will find a poor schmuck who's willing to let me do what i want

when im home alone, im always scared that the saw guy is gon come get me

i got a thing for pudgy dudes

i almost went to the air force but my grandma didnt want me to go so i didnt

i was so into the backstreet boys/nsync era and i still am

i avoid conflict at all costs

im embarrassed by the last couple of folk who broke my heart

i own dresses i just dont wear them

im very into fashion and different designers like oscar de la renta and herve leger

i had a full ride to howard but i lost it tryna go to the air force

i dont like taking pictures at all

i like white boys

im always hungry

Throwback of The Day: Sugar Hill Gang-Jump On It

2008-12-04T16:03:00.002-05:00

Probably one of the most memorable scenes in TV history,this has to be one of my favorite episodes of Fresh Prince.

After You've Done All You Can, You Just Stand: Donnie McClurken-Stand

2008-11-28T12:40:00.003-05:00

Man, this Thanksgiving was very interesting. I don't talk too much about my family other than my sisters, becuz of the feelings that it erupts in me. But right now, I honestly don't know what to do.

I got a 16 year old sister who wants to be an adult. I also have a ten year old sister who is so misunderstood to the point where she doesnt't feel welcomed in her own home. And a mother who after almost 22 years of motherhood still hasn't gotten the hang of it at all.

I try my best to keep it all together while keeping my sanity, but it seems like an impossible task. So is it selfish of me to choose me?

I'm not the most mentally stable role model for them, but the only thing I know to do is stand for them. Even if they don't want me to.

LOL....Just Randomness

2008-11-25T16:34:00.001-05:00

Excuse Me, I Just find this Hilarious

Charles Barkley's Quote of The Day

2008-11-24T20:23:00.002-05:00

“If you go out with a girl and they say she has a great personality, she’s ugly. If they tell you a guy works hard, he can’t play a lick. Same thing.”

Throwback of the Day: Christion-Full of Smoke

2008-11-20T17:26:00.002-05:00

They were signed to Rocafella around the early 90's I believe, and I remember hearing this song when I was younger with my older cousins as we rode around the hood.

My Last Obama Post

2008-11-18T20:50:00.000-05:00

I just couldn't resist posting this when I saw it!

Random Rant Post #1

2008-11-12T17:22:00.002-05:00

- Is there something wrong with being insecure?

- I feel like at 21 I'm no where in my life that I feel i should be

- Im also scared that God's plan for me will take me somewhere i dont wanna go

- i hate my hair its too much

- being in a bar full of white people drunk make me uncomfortable

- i need a successful relationship with a person, just one, before i die

- i dont know if i ever will be able to be a singer

- thank god im not pregnant

- is it too much to ask for just a piece of your time

- i am in extreme pain right now but im at work

- and about this job, am i stuck here forever

- i feel like a brat when i look at this list and realize so many others have been thru worst

Beyonce's New Album

2008-11-09T16:44:00.001-05:00

I Am....Sasha Fierce

Track List
----------
Disc 1:
01. If I Were a Boy 4:09
02. Halo 4:25
03. Disappear 4:29
04. Broken-Hearted Girl 4:38
05. Ave Maria 3:42
06. Satellites 3:07

Disc 2:
01. Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) 3:12
02. Radio 3:39
03. Diva 3:21
04. Sweet Dreams 3:28
05. Video Phone 3:36

I get the whole Sasha Fierce thing, but didn't the two personalities thing play out wit TI vs. TIP. I'm just sayin.........

I's On Twitter Now!

2008-11-08T19:16:00.002-05:00

My co-worker put me up on Twitter and I kinda like it. I need people to follow. If u on Twitter drop ur name so I can follow u (in a non creepy stalker type way).

www.twitter.com/thalyracist

So cute!!!!!

2008-11-06T18:20:00.001-05:00

Bout Time......

2008-11-05T12:57:00.001-05:00

Click To Enlarge

I Think I'm Pregnant

2008-11-04T16:44:00.000-05:00

........

(sigh)

........

Revolutionary Suicide

2008-11-03T17:57:00.002-05:00

The autobiography by Huey P. Newton is slated to be re-issued next year. I'm getting me a copy since I can't find one in Detroit.

I Got A Migraine

2008-10-29T16:44:00.000-04:00

Ugh

Obama Loves The Kids

2008-10-27T17:47:00.000-04:00

Yesterday Was My Birthday....

2008-10-23T17:45:00.001-04:00

.......and I'm still drunk!!!!!!!!

Pics coming soon....

To give u a taste...

If Mos Def Was President

2008-10-21T17:07:00.000-04:00

birthday is tomorrow!!!

Happy Birthday Darrius!!!!!

2008-10-20T22:15:00.001-04:00

http://darriusmind.blogspot.com/

Jiva featuring the AV CLUB

2008-10-15T22:28:00.000-04:00

Nike SB Blazer x Lance Mountain

2008-10-15T17:54:00.000-04:00

Still In A Sour Mood

2008-10-14T17:57:00.000-04:00

Y'all pray for me

My Phone Broke

2008-10-09T16:26:00.001-04:00

I'm in a very sour mood. Can't wait til mah birthday. 13 Mo Dayz!

My Charles Barkley Quote For The Day

2008-10-08T20:59:00.002-04:00

"You got to believe in yourself. Hell, I believe I'm the best-looking guy in the world and I might be right."

Kanye West-Love Lockdown

2008-10-07T15:28:00.000-04:00

Not Enough For Himself

2008-10-06T18:07:00.001-04:00

It's This Article I Read And I'm Really Feeling It. It's Definitely Worth The Read

http://clutchmagonline.com/lifeculture/feature/not-enough-for-himself/

Not Enough for Himself...

I recently ended a short relationship with a guy who was not living to his full potential. This guy is handsome, thoughtful, intimate, kind and very sexy. Brought me flowers and rubbed my feet. Kissed me passionately and knew my every move. Every time we were together, my attraction grew more and more but it suddenly began to fade once the infatuation wore off and reality kicked in. While in the process of my looking for a teaching position we began to spend almost every moment with each other. We were either out and about or lying around at my home talking. We have many things in common, our activities, our idiosyncrasies and some moments of our lives paralleled. He was into me as I he, and practically we were a couple. BUT there was something in me that would not allow myself to commit to him. He had no self-value and no matter how I tried to explain it to him, he felt I was attacking his manhood and demoralizing his character and he would turn the conversation into why we had not had sex.

When my infatuation began to fade, I began to listen to him talk and was perturbed when he said that he knows a lot of people with degrees and had not seen anything great come from them. I questioned him on his future goals—he replied I plan to buy a house and married with at least two kids in the next two years. This would have sent my spirits flying five years ago, but instead it raised an eyebrow. He said nothing of how he was going to pay for the house, the wedding, the children. I asked him about career goals and he in turn asked me to share my 5-10 year plan in order to get a few ideas about how to answer the question. Red flag. Among other incidents that occurred, it was clear this thirty-two year old man’s priorities were not in order. He was not taking care of his life business and it was showing through his insecurities, lack of motivation and extreme sensitivity. His weaknesses were beginning to show or maybe they were already there and I just thought they were cute.

I asked a few of my male friends about this guy’s potential and if I should be cautious of getting close to him. Each of them asked the same questions:

1. What happened in his last relationship? Why did they really split?
2. What is his social life? Who are his friends and what do they do?
3. What is his relationship with his mother?

I found out his last girlfriend gave him an ultimatum to get his life together, even if that meant moving back to his mother’s home, or she’d leave. She had been carrying the both of them for over a year because he made little to no attempt to find a job worth having.

I noticed that he had little to no friends. Maybe six to be exact and one in particular he belittled every chance he had. When I finally met the guy, it was evident that he was merely a self-esteem friend and nothing more than the guy my guy could feel good around. My lover didn’t seem to have a solid circle of friends to uplift him, support him or simply release the day to day stress. Instead he fed them lies of his stability, living big and perfect relationships; all which doesn’t leave any reason for questions.

As for his mother . . . he never talked about her so it’s tough to know exactly how their relationship is. He lived at home until 27 as the good son who takes care of the house and loves his mama and may not have been asked to do more than what was needed. Transfer that to a relationship and you have a yes man who does what’s needed to keep the woman happy and oblivious to the nothings he does in the rest of the world. A mama’s boy without the skills to survive out in the real world who finds a mate who’s just like moms to continue his lifestyle.

Then it dawned on me; where there is he, there are a million just like him. Black men who do not have goals, nor ideas as to what the hell they will be doing at forty or fifty years old. I fear being with a man who does not take care of himself and are too prideful to acknowledge it. It is these same men who will tell a women their long term goal is to marry and have kids and buy a house without mention of a career or financial backing believing it will suffice women. It’s insulting to women. I am not speaking of all Black men, I am speaking of the men who are one paycheck away from being on the street and don’t see anything wrong with it. The men who are in their thirties and beyond, able-bodied and healthy, who does not push themselves. These are men who are not sure of themselves, their wants and needs and don’t see anything wrong with living day to day. These are the men who are afraid of tomorrow and believes deeply that he’ll still be doing the same thing he’s doing today if he doesn’t do find what it is he wants to do. Sadly he doesn’t know what that is. These are the men who have a thousand and one skills that make him experienced in any entry-level position but lack the education or capability to take on a management role. These are the men who choose to just be instead of just doing it. Maybe it’s a lack of nurturing at a young age, parental issues, self-esteem issues or just plain careless, but these men are in denial of living. Putting fliers on freeways in the middle of the night and calling yourself an independent promotions consultant is an example of denial.

Fellas must have more than penis, sperm and a ring when they come knocking on doors nowadays, because women have not only the vajayjay, circus tricks and exceptional felatio, we have degrees (plural), homes, bank accounts—savings, checking, money-markets, 401K’s, cars, businesses, we have responsibilities to take care of and a lifestyle to maintain so its only natural that we require the same of potential mates. I love my beautiful Kings and embrace them in all of their glory, but my lover’s list specifically states he must have at least what I have or is in the process of getting that and more. It is unfortunate that he has all of the physical qualities and attributes I requested but does not see value in himself to be a man I want to invest my time in. I could blame society, but it’s his individual effort. He has to want more for himself. I refuse to settle for someone who treats me good and doesn’t believe he’s worth the same love.

Self-love is a key factor in relationships. I’ve learned from this experience that I love myself so much more than I did five years ago, hell last year. It’s important to have inner strength because it makes sure that you do not limit yourself, you don’t settle even when the playing field seems to be overwhelming. We’re over and yes I miss his touch, his conversation, I miss his companionship, but I know that I am stronger for not trying to force it to work. Maybe he’ll get it one day, maybe he won’t but either way I’m a stronger person, a stronger woman and I am ok with my inner works still being in progress. Piece by piece I grow closer to my view of perfection.

Vh1's 100 Greatest Hip Hop Songs of All Time......

2008-09-30T17:22:00.001-04:00

..is some straight up bullshit!!!!!!

If you watch that shit for longer than 30 mins, I no longer respect you as a hip hop head.

Who You Givin Your Voting Virginity To?

2008-09-29T16:53:00.002-04:00

Tomorrow's A Big Day!!!

2008-09-26T19:15:00.002-04:00

I have an audition with a producer tomorrow, and I'm really nervous. I hope that he picks me up as a singer/songwriter for his production company. He's a very well known producer so this might be my big chance! Pray for me!!

Nike SB Summer 2009: MY PICKS!!!

2008-09-25T17:51:00.003-04:00

These are what I'll be waiting on next year praying the stores got some in GS sizes. There's more pics at the link below

Via Nike SB

PS. For those who are sneaker fans, have u noticed the surge of Nike iD ads online? Or am I just late?

Notorious Trailer

2008-09-24T19:35:00.001-04:00

I think they just premiered it today! I am def going to see this. I wasn't a fan of the folks they chose in the beginning, but now seeing it makes me a believer.

Spike Lee Is The Shit!!!!

2008-09-24T17:46:00.000-04:00

Welcome to MySpace: Spike Lee

Nike WMNS Air Troupe Mid

2008-09-19T19:48:00.002-04:00

I feel a different way about these every time I see them. Currently, I'm loving them!

Via HypeBeast

My 21th Birthday

2008-09-16T16:46:00.001-04:00

I'll be 21 on October 22nd. What should I do?

I Don't Wear Heels But......

2008-09-15T16:55:00.001-04:00

I'll hurt my ankles to wear these...

http://www.net-a-porter.com/product/33439#

I Did It!

2008-09-11T19:16:00.004-04:00

For those who have been keeping up wit my randomness, y'all would know that I have been take baby steps towards my goal of becoming a singer. Well, a couple of weeks, I performed at an open mic in Nashville. Now I hate the way I look, but to prove it, I brought pics. Plz don't laugh at me! The whole day I was cooped up in a lab watching the oxygenation in a person's brain thru an MRI. So I look worn out. But it was fun, and I received alot of love from the other artist there.

I sung "emotional rollercoaster" by vivian green.

Wise Dome- O.K. Yeah

2008-09-07T18:38:00.002-04:00

This is a friend of mine's song, and he asked for me to put it on my blog for you guys opinion. So check it out, and be COMPLETELY honest. Thx!!!

And I got the pics from Nashville finally, but I'm too tired so I'll do it tomorrow.

My Summer...PT 1

2008-09-03T21:57:00.003-04:00

Just Random Places and People I Saw

Inter-Faith Relationships?

2008-09-02T17:09:00.003-04:00

Do they work? Could you see yourself in one?

UPDATE: An interfaith relationship is two folks who are dating but practicing different religions I.e. a Muslim and a Christian dating

Random Thought

2008-08-28T16:34:00.002-04:00

I just Saw Ralph Tresvant (New Edition) and he looks like a straight up crackhead.

That is all.

Still looking for that damn cord.

Nike WMNS Blazer High-Elephant Capricorn

2008-08-22T15:11:00.003-04:00

Via Nitrolicious. I need these in my life.

UPDATE: I Need These Too!

PS Still Can't find that cord

I Put On For......

2008-08-21T10:25:00.005-04:00

I saw on someone's blog a list of things they "put on" for like the Young Jeezy song, and it made me think about what my list would be and I'm interested in what some of u put on for. So I'm gonna tag a couple of people to it, and see what u guys come up with!

I'm tagging:
Taryn B.
Kid.A
Karrie B.
Muze

I PUT ON FOR:
My City (of course!)Not the best pic but I took it

My Sisters

Shanice, 16 (Dis one the reason I'm getting my CCW)

Robyn, will be ten on the 24th(The Most Important Person In My Life Right Now)

My Music!

My Blog!!!!

All Those Who Blogging!!!!

All Y'all Who Out Here Following Your Dreams!!!!

My Struggling college students

Those who been taking care of themselves since the teenage years

My sneakers!!!

I'm running out of stuff, so I'll update as I think of it!

PS. Soon as I can find my USB cord, I'm gonna tell u guys about Nashville cuz you have to see the pics to believe!

I'm Taking A Va-Ca!

2008-08-17T18:22:00.004-04:00

I'll be in Nashville for the next few days participating in this research study at Vanderbilt University. Hoe ass campus won't even let u on Facebook or Myspace!!!! I wish my laptop was fixed. :( But I know I'll have some crazy stories when I get bacl.

L8R!

I Gotta Make A Couple Of ShoutOuts!

2008-08-11T13:43:00.006-04:00

K, mah bloggin twin has created a shirt that she's selling on her blog ShortyPop. They are super dope!!!! Click on the pic to check her out, and get a shirt or two!!!

Also, the sneaker store I intern for has been nominated for Best Men's Shoe Store. We are currently in second place, but we are behind 16%!!!! I need all of y'all help to make us number 1! You do have to register for the site, but we really need the exposure. Just click on the button to vote!!!!!!

L8R!!!!

***UPDATE 8/15/2008****

WE ARE NOW ONLY BEHIND BY 9%!!!! THANKS YOU GUYS SO MUCH AND KEEP VOTING!!!!!!

Ok Im A Punk! LOL

2008-08-08T09:02:00.004-04:00

I went, and didn't sign up. I was too nervous! Ugh!

Meanwhile, look at mah new shoes!!!!!! Cute, right? That's REAL horse hairs.

Well, See...What Had Happened Was....

2008-07-31T14:21:00.001-04:00

I went, but the cd player wasn't working, and I was too afraid to sing without the music, so I decided to wait until next week. I wasn't as nervous as I thought I was gonna be, and I'm looking forward to next week!

Random Photo Post #1

2008-07-28T13:52:00.004-04:00

I'm so nervous! Tomorrow is the day is sing to the world!!! I have been practing like crazy, which is why i haven't posted in awhile but I do have tons of photos to show u all!

My Handy Dandy Backpack (I take it everywhere I go, even the clubs)

This Cutie Pie I Saw On The Bus (I Wanted To Talk To Him, But I Was Too Shy :( )

Everytime I Try And Get On This Particular Bus Route and This Guy Is Waiting With Me, The Bus is always at LEAST an hour late. I dedcided to take another one this day

The View Of DownTown Detroit Outside My Intern Window

What I Don't Wanna Be in 20 Years: 40 and Broke

L8R!!!!

One Week Away!!!!!!!

2008-07-22T15:29:00.004-04:00

The open mic is exactly one week away from today, and I am already nervous!!!! I got down the songs I wanna sing , and I have been rehearsing alot.

Also, I got so may pics to show u guys but my phone isn't syncing with the computer, and it takes forever to email them one by one. So when i get everything up, yall will be the first to see!